Category: Essay

  • What Matters? Fordham Rebrand Falls Flat on Purpose

    First impressions are important. In the wider field of graphic design — rife with slick poseurs, ardent objectivists, gleeful contrarians, and vague distant relations who could’ve done the job better for peanuts — first impressions are do-or-die. 

    “If St. Ignatius saw this, he would wish he’d been hit in the head by the cannonball instead of the leg,” roughly reads one of the most-liked comments on Fordham University’s rebrand announcement on Instagram. 

    The new identity system debuted with a sizzle reel on July 31, 2025 — a Thursday. Headlining (and, on Instagram, thumbnail-ing) the rebrand was a new primary F mark, but the new brand system includes a host of new marks, lockups, palettes, font pairings, slogans, and communication guidelines. Thousands of hours of work between brand agency Ologie and the university’s various in-house teams lay behind a new system applied to every corner of Fordham’s branding, and it was all introduced to the public in one sizzle reel. 

    The community sentiment was overwhelmingly negative. Fordham — its marketers, its in-house designers, and the firm it contracted to execute the rebrand — failed to make a good first impression. 

    Few fields besides graphic design produce work so ubiquitous and so commonly consumed that arbiters of taste hand down judgement simply on the sole qualification of having commonly consumed the work. Few highly technical professions have as low a barrier of entry.

    A desk-duty middle manager “whipping something up” is inconceivable in a machine shop. Tech firms are not scrambling to democratize HVAC maintenance by harnessing the power of AI. To be sure, there are unappeasable blowhards managing (and even leading) every profession. Few outside of modern art, however, use familiarity with the end product — combined with a certainty in its complete subjectivity — to exert control on the finished product with little more than vibes-based judgment, as is du jour in graphic design.

    “I showed this logo to my dog, and he didn’t like it. Could you make it pop more?”

    First impressions are about getting out ahead of it all. They’re about establishing total expertise and trustworthiness, communicating at the level of the target audience, and presenting a solved problem. A first impression is not defensive — aimed to answer questions before they’re asked — it’s offensive: here is the problem, here is the solution, and here are the different benchmarks by which the problem is solved.

    It is rarely so easy. It is the unfortunate reality that a graphic designer’s job — just as much as the software manipulation, the vendor visits, and the constant portfolio building — is to sell themselves and prove their professional worth at all times. 

    It’s a matter of first impressions. Get good at them, or hunker down for the blowback. 

    Through graphic design and marketing, I was sold a particular vision of Fordham University as a prospective student. Beyond the smiling faces and lists of majors, I was offered an academic experience based in a long tradition of Jesuits — bona-fide hippies of the Catholic world — and their knack for top-of-the-line educational institutions. I was promised a two-campus experience that blurred the boundaries between the city and the institution; sold on the slogan “New York is my campus, Fordham is my school.” 

    Fordham was marketed to me as an old guard of do-gooders intermeshed with the largest, most diverse city in the nation. A gem of tradition and near-mystique that welcomed skeptics, religious and otherwise.

    I was intrigued by Jesuit-in-origin but progressive-to-this-day tenets of holistic care and advocacy; of radical acceptance and an obligation to serve others. A lifetime public school product, I read the glossy Fordham mailers and decided that these Catholics had the right idea.

    On Accepted Students’ Day, then-President Joseph M. McShane, S.J. threw the crowd a line that stuck with me: “You come to Fordham, I can promise you one thing. You will be bothered here.”

    I did. I was.

    Marketing by nature over-promises, and Fordham University was no exception. The values the school plastered everywhere were not statements of fact. Taken optimistically, they were aspirational. 

    When I saw the school at its best, those values were exactly that.

    Drawing from a well-publicized font of tradition, students and faculty held the school to its own professed standards and implored it to do better. Over and over, Fordham University was told that it was better than — had been better than, must return to being better than, could someday be better than — its reality. It could integrate better into its surroundings and give back to the communities in which it resided. It could represent a cross-section of the city population. It could stand up for the oppressed and offer a guiding light for the truth-seekers. 

    The marketing was turned back around on itself: Fordham was old enough and wise enough — and had the right priorities in place — to do what’s right. 

    Though nonlinear and frequently slower than needed, change at Fordham felt present and possible by design. Marketing told a glossier tale, and branding tied it up in a bow, but the real story was in there, moving ever-closer to the ideal.

    Isn’t that what being Catholic is all about? A lifelong struggle for that which is out of reach? Highest-of-high standards that force us to commit to the long, glorious, futile, imperfect journey?

    By its own marketing, Fordham was old. It was storied. It called its community to be Christlike. When wielded by the community, it was self-actualizing.

    Hopeful, staccato strings crescendo into megachurch drums — all suspiciously stock-sounding — and Fordham’s new brand makes its first impression. 

    The first visual is a close-up detail of the old letterforms morphing into the new. This technique is helpful when trying to convey to an audience an effort to subtly and faithfully modernize typography — by way of a smooth transition effect, designers show that there is a trace of the old in the new; there is continuity in the refinement. It is not nearly as helpful in the present application, as one typeface simply expands into a separate, chunkier and less detailed typeface. We watch the wordmark lose character in real time. 

    The reel continues, and we read that the brand is “inspired by bringing tradition and architecture together.” The tradition referenced goes undefined in the video. We are, however, shown that the architecture component is of the neo-gothic variety found in the older buildings on the picturesque Rose Hill campus, including the flagship Keating Hall.

    “Collegiate Gothic” architecture is a recognizable hallmark of many colleges and universities, the 19th-century style of choice to call back to the the world’s oldest, most venerated learning institutions. 

    My college search included countless road trips and campus tours, and I considered architecture to be an important part of my assessment of a school. Neo-gothic buildings, while beautiful, began to blur together very quickly.

    Gothic architecture is a notable feature of one campus, but not a university-defining one. There is no gothic architecture on the Lincoln Center campus, the Westchester campus, nor the Calder Center, nor Fordham London Center. New construction at Rose Hill adopts a contemporary style that, most charitably, is gothic-inspired. 

    Possessing old buildings constructed in neo-gothic style, widely popular within an institution’s niche for the time, contained within a single campus, is a limited foundation on which to build a contemporary global brand.

    To pin a particular architectural style to a multi-borough, multi-country, city-first university feels like a disservice at best, and disingenuous at worst. The tradition and architecture, as defined by the reel, seem to be one in the same: a certain style of old building. 

    The gothic inspiration is revealed to manifest in a blackletter, gothic-style capital F. To be clear, the letterform is not shaped by specific curves and corners of Rose Hill architecture, nor refined from a specific F cut in stone somewhere on campus. It is just gothic-inspired. 

    The F mark itself is inoffensive, even adequately constructed. It just doesn’t mean much.

    The gothic F ostensibly replaces the existing block-letter F used for merchandise and sports branding, though the gothic F is further elevated to the primary mark, used across almost all implementations of the brand, including athletics. For an academic institution to increase, not decrease, emphasis on and ubiquity of a big, red F seems to invite the usual jeers the Fordham community is used to in even greater numbers.

    The block F was an extremely simple lettermark, borne of design, printing, and embroidery constraints of old. By virtue of its antiquated beginning — compared to the pseudo-antiquated, gothic-inspired F — the block F communicated a specific brand of collegiate tradition. Far from clever or symbolic in its own right, the block F aligns with a pared-back view on university branding: the name is more important than the mark. Block letters are accepted collegiate visual vernacular: the more austere, the more retro; the simpler, the better-connected to time long past. 

    Longevity — enough to infuse history and meaning — beats clever design most days. Though the newcomer gothic F does not hold the same richness of significance, it is relied upon much more heavily in the new brand than the block F was in the old.

    The reel rolls on. The seal of Fordham University appears, then is grayed, and a shield shape is found within it. The shield contains the Christogram IHS, the central symbol on the Jesuit emblem. The Christogram is also grayed — the focus is drawn only to the outline of the shield.

    The shield is not uniquely shaped or proportioned. The particular shape does not itself feature prominently in Jesuit imagery. The university seal is not widely noted for the shield it contains. It is wholly without defining characteristic.

    The reel adds the shape to the primary mark — the gothic F layered on top of the shield shape. The music crescendoes; this is the big reveal.

    The shield would seem to have little reason to be elevated so. Like the F atop it, the shield as a symbol is set up to fail, robbed of significance. The most the shield shape can communicate, given a shield shape is ubiquitous in university seals and coats-of-arms, is that Fordham is, in fact, a learning institution. 

    Much like blackletter gothic type, shields are not limited to higher education, however. The mark could serve well as a luxury hotel chain, medieval castle conservatory, or line of high-end pens.

    Combined, the gothic F and shield mark can only communicate that Fordham may be a university, and it might also be old. Broad, shallow meaning is given priority — isolated, even; championed — and the resulting mark struggles to differentiate the brand among a given lineup of contemporary university marks. 

    It is a surface-level execution of the reel’s original premise: combining tradition and architecture. An invitation to search for deeper meaning — to be drawn into the complicated world of the university — is absent.

    Newer institutions attempting to affect an old-world, ivy look would arrive at a similar depth of meaning in a mark. To borrow a term from the world of post-millennial sports franchises, it’s not a throwback; it’s a fauxback.

    The full lockup fades into view. Narrow tolerances and sharp intersections created by layering the F over the shield bring tension to the mark. The letters below, in contrast, are unremarkable and smooth, with slightly flared pseudo-serifs so small and subtle as to be barely noticeable. The lockup is discordant — sharp and smooth, hair-fine and ultra-thick, nearly two different approaches — and it communicates very little, positive or otherwise, about the institution.

    The former wordmark is as intricate as the seal that accompanied it in the former lockup — finer, varied-weight lines, curving, near-organic serifs, and tight tracking. The seal itself, the purest and primary visual signifier of Fordham University, is worth more taken as a single symbol than as a collection of its many elements. Much like the shield shape, a seal is a common signifier of authority in academia and elsewhere — but unlike the shield alone, it has prominent, unique elements that help it to stand out, even when the finer details are ignored. 

    It was more to manage — a  bigger lift, I’m sure, to apply to some edge cases. The lockup is a more intricate, delicate visual balancing act of type, space, and legibility. The payoff for successful application, on the other hand, is visual richness equally full in meaning.

    Simplifying visual identities for screens was law at the dawn of social media, but the phones of the 2020s have more pixels than the human eye can discern. If the simplification of the primary lockup was a technical move, motivated by readability, such an arguable overcorrection replaces the quirks and visual signifiers of the old lockup with forgettable symbolism. 

    When less is more, the less conveys similar meaning in a deeper, more visually efficient way. The extra space is an invitation. The simpler forms have meaning behind every angle and color choice. When less is just less, meaning is traded for trendy aesthetics — and functionality, if you’re lucky.

    In a Logos and Branding class at Fordham University, I participated in a Q&A with Armin Vit, graphic designer and publisher/writer of Brand New, a chronicle and frequent editorial of high-profile rebrands as they happened. He told us “Designers love to talk shit. They love saying they could’ve done better, and they have no idea what went into the design process, or how many people they had to convince.”

    He was right, of course. Fordham’s rebrand — to my slight disappointment, only marked “noted,” not “reviewed” on Brand New — was their initiative alone, and all who worked on it surely worked hard and delivered to the best of their ability. Designers love to talk shit, and you’re reading it right now. 

    The lion’s share of community sentiment around Fordham’s first impression of the rebrand, however, didn’t discount effort. It didn’t criticize color, type, and layout. Some called it corporate, bland, discordant, trendy, nothing special, and too great of a change, to be sure.

    Most, however, just asked “Why?”

    Deeming a rebrand unnecessary is one of the most damning indictments an audience can hand out. With a legacy brand adapted to modern applications — as I experienced firsthand as a prospective student, attendee, and now alum — Fordham did not appear to be suffering from a brand that held itself back visually. On the copy end, Jesuit tenets and aspirational sloganeering with real-world meaning seemed to elevate Fordham above standard university marketing of the “leading,” “soaring,” “succeeding” ilk. In sum, and reflected in increasing admissions, new construction, rising tuition, and overflowing dorms, the Fordham brand appeared to be working.

    It matters why Fordham thought it necessary to rebrand — as the sizzle reel, supporting documentation and further posting paid little attention to the “Why” behind it all. 

    In a hostile comments section, the Fordham University Instagram account met most negative comments with a condescendingly corporate-cheerful, “bestie”-laden tone. The purpose of the interactions — or at least the objective as executed — seemed to be refuting criticism. Given the chance to acknowledge community concerns, redirect to positive aspects of the new brand, or simply provide a rationale — business, academic, or otherwise — for the initiative, the university chose snarky one-liners. 

    After a failed first impression, Fordham was on the defensive, chiding members of the community with internet slang for accusing the rebrand of missing the mark.

    Since the first announcement of the new brand, Fordham has published a few videos and rounded out top-line applications. Many Fordham-affiliated accounts have been made to adopt the exact same profile picture — not coordinated, not sporting fresh illustrations in the new brand style, not even color-differentiated. A parade of red Fs assemble at the top of my Instagram feed like a brutal report card. Any trace of the Ramses, the mascot, in the brand has been removed, not evolved.

    Applied for a week — all the video content, the webpages, the merch — the brand does little to assuage concerns expressed in the comments section of Fordham’s one shot at a first impression. 

    Visual cues, footage, copy, and even Fordham’s iconic maroon hat — a giveaway so common every student has at least one — seem flatter. They feel less unique. In forgoing actual tradition in favor of common signifiers of tradition, the rebrand’s primary motivation seems to be a very shallow, zero-sum idea of marketability. 

    The new brand feels like the New York I imagined as a suburban mid-Atlantic teenager, before I came to Fordham. The brand leverages basic, cookie-cutter identifiers of the city, the university, and the general pursuit of education at the expense of authenticity — the single most important buzzword in the conversation on how to market to Generation Z and younger.

    At every turn, the rebrand feels isolated from Fordham — or Fordham, seen from 30,000 feet. It reads like an outsider’s idea of what New York is like. It largely ignores the Bronx, only concerned with the campus inside Rose Hill’s spiked wrought-iron fence. It forgoes the Lincoln Square neighborhood and its cultural powerhouses in favor of wide-angle shots of the larger Manhattan skyline. 

    It is a strong recentering of Rose Hill as the main campus — despite enrollment testing dorm capacity at Lincoln Center — and on the way, it treats the city as an accessory; a destination to visit, not something to live within. 

    Would it come as any surprise that Ologie, the firm behind the rebrand, is based in Ohio?

    Would it further shock and stun that Ologie markets itself as a consultant exclusively for the academic field? A firm fully tapped into the trends of collegiate branding and marketing delivered a final product they knew would satisfy the aesthetic tastes of that world. A firm based hundreds of miles from the cultural and design capital of the nation, maybe the world — and largest city in the United States by millions and millions — made a brand formerly inextricable from the city it called home almost entirely independent of it. 

    In the new brand collateral — especially the first sizzle reel — there are no design, music, videography, or contributing credits shouting out Fordham students or graduates. Beyond focus groups and “participants” mentioned offhand, it seems Fordham neglected to use its own brain trust — or the top-of-market design resources of New York City — to inform the rebrand in any significant way. 

    For a cynic, the rebrand is in sum more faithful to the school’s value system in practice — and a more pragmatic summation of what draws wide swathes of bright suburban kids and their tuition dollars to New York. Whether this will further bolster application rates and convince more deep pockets and their progeny to wear Fordham maroon is yet to be seen, but the calculus is there. 

    That logic is void of aspiration; a contemporary data-driven coldness that equates a university’s profit with its value. This outlook sees a spoken desire to improve the world, no matter the cost, as ignorant idealism; a failure to play by today’s terms. It dismisses aspirational, heritage branding as functionally useless.

    While a more secular outward appearance is by definition marketable to a larger audience, the appeal of a Catholic institution more skeptical than dogmatic was an intriguing selling point when it came time to commit. An ancient order dedicated to the greater glory of creation was busy celebrating beauty and understanding the world around them, not mandating faith pledges and enforcing curfews, and they wanted people to come to their school with all their questions and doubts. The kind of person energized by that prospect seems like the ideal Fordham candidate; a value match beyond Sunday service.

    In the comments of the first reel, Fordham claimed to have developed the rebrand by community committee, citing alumni outreach that must have missed my inbox. Graphic design is a subjective profession, but that Thursday, beyond any technical critique, Fordham could not sell a brand to its own community that was engineered to be more marketable. There is a soullessness to the rebrand that any Fordham Ram, past or present, could pick out.

    The rebrand’s primary slogan is “For What Matters.” That’s not shortened in any way, nor is it an attempt at satire. Put another way, the slogan amounts to “We have values.” Making specific, stated values secondary to the idea of possessing principles results in just as flat an end product as any visual component of the new brand. Significance is sacrificed for trend and sizzle — executed bluntly. Turned back around on itself, the brand poses a hollow question: What matters? 

    In the face of a flat, derivative visual identity and an uninspiring message, there is no satisfying answer.

  • Freud and Jung Broke Up at Fordham

    The psychoanalysis of dreams that came after

    In 1912, Carl Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, delivered a series of six lectures at Fordham University. Students surely knew—or were at least briefed by their professors—that Dr. Jung was the protégé of a certain Sigmund Freud, father of psychoanalysis and father-figure to the man who lectured before them.

    What they didn’t know was that this dynamic duo, almost always in ideological lockstep and seen as the two men guiding the bleeding edge of the budding field of psychoanalysis, was about to suffer a tremendous falling-out. 

    Jung saw the publishing of these lectures, The Symbols of Transformation, as the turning point in their relationship. Fordham University witnessed the breakup of Freud and Jung over differences that culminated in six lessons on Jung’s differing views on libido (Sharpe).

    An oversimplification, to be sure. However, this turning point nevertheless marks the beginning of the ideological rift between the two theorists that would set them apart in their field for the rest of their careers. Though Jung would go on to publish much work on the field of analytical psychology, one battleground within the realm of psychoanalysis in which Jung and Freud would differ greatly is the meaning of dreams.

    Dreams are a product of the unconscious mind—on that the two can agree. Freud introduced the idea that a role of the unconscious is to facilitate repression. The negation of base urges and desires seen as socially unacceptable or taboo uses the unconscious mind as a receptacle as the conscious mind saves face (Freud). Though Freud’s understanding of repressed urges is primarily sexual, this would be somewhat negated later by Jung, who generally prescribed to Freud’s sexual emphasis up until the falling-out.

    Freud’s more developed understanding of the unconscious coincided with his theories on dreams in The Interpretation of Dreams. Understanding “dream content” as the manifest reality of a dream and “dream thought” as latent, underlying meaning supplied by the subconscious, the work sets out to explore the ways in which dreams may mean more than their often-nonsensical nature would suggest (Freud).

    Through the act of condensation, Freud believes that the unconscious is able to package the dream thought and content into a single dream. The displacement of the dream describes the mismatch between dream thought and content—the repression Freud establishes makes clear messages of desire unable to be clearly expressed. For Freud, dreams are the workaround and dream analysis the decoder of these messages. The external aspects of a dream were Freud’s main focus—too much subjectivity would ruin one’s abilities to interpret the signs as they were relayed (Taveras).

    Jung differs in his conception of dream analysis. Instead of the free association characteristic of Freudian dream analysis, Jung prefers to “stick as close as possible to the dream images.” Building off of the manifest content of dreams, Jungian dream analysis relies on a detailed analysis of the more literal implications of certain concepts in dreams, as opposed to looser methods of association (Jung). Freud’s assumptions of sticks in dreams would not sit all too well with Jung (Sharpe).

    Jung’s notion of dreams includes, however, the act of amplification—the association of dream content with images from other sources. Drawing from popular culture and myth, for example, Jungian dream analysis looks to identify archetypal parallels through which the unconscious may very well be working as well (Taveras). This smacks of the loose, free-associative methods of Freudian psychoanalysis, but perhaps in this case with more emphasis on the internalized societal influences on the subject. 

    The act of dream analysis, as described by both Jung and Freud, attempts to distinguish the primary meaning behind what often amount to be discordant and nonsensical metaphors created by the subconscious as a response to a conscious unwillingness to simply express such primary meaning.

    Where Freud believed these coded messages were the result of specifically sexual repression, Jung believed the dream served to work through issues that plagued the conscious mind and focused on the finer details of the dream content (Taveras). Disagreeing strongly with Freud on the proper way to extrapolate all aspects of a dream, Jung sought to analyze the subjective and objective content of the dream in the interest of observing how an individual might both knowingly and unknowingly affect their dream content. 

    The state of dream analysis in the field of psychoanalysis might have seen its rise in the duo of Freud and Jung, but the rift that formed between them served to demonstrate how differently dreams can be interpreted—and how some parts of the process remained the same. Perhaps it was better for the world that their relationship deteriorated, the final straw at our very own Fordham University.

    Of all the hundreds of thousands of breakups that have occurred across campuses, it’s the best one I’ve heard of to date.

    Works Cited


    • Freud, Sigmund. “The Interpretation of Dreams.” Literary Theory: an Anthology, ed. Rivkin, Julie, and Michael Ryan.  Wiley Blackwell, 2017, 575-591.
    • Sharpe, Ella Freeman. Dream Analysis: A Practical Handbook for Psycho-Analysts. Maresfield Library, 1988, pp. 34-45.
    • Jung, C. G., ed. Anthony Storr. The Essential Jung. Princeton Univ. Press, 1983.
    • Taveras, Maria. “Jungian Dream Analysis.” Maria Taveras, Psychotherapist, jungiantherapy.com/jungian-dream-analysis/.
  • A.P. Style

    The Oxford comma and I have a complicated relationship.

    I have no quarrel with the comma itself—it’s often a leisurely, much-needed pause in an otherwise long and droning serial. 

    On the other hand, well—it’s not A.P. style.

    Throughout my academic career, throughout every piece of writing I’ve scribbled and submitted on a whim, I can say with certainty that I never cracked a style book. Never did it cross my mind to find out how to properly refer to senators, nor the best abbreviation for the states of the union. I didn’t know that “internet” only recently lost its capital I in the eyes of the A.P., and I didn’t care about the superiority of “OK” over “okay.”

    Perhaps the persnickety details of one style guide aren’t enough to paint a convincing picture, but the point remains: I have long worked under the fatal assumption that creative writers don’t give a damn about the rules. 

    I’d read enough “experimental” writing—funky spacing, out-there poetry and bad-on-purpose-but-you-just-don’t-get-it prose—that I assumed creative writers (myself, of course, ranking squarely among them) reached down into their subconscious and produced a fully-formed, Pulitzer-winning first draft on command.

    I thought that creative writing was a high art reserved for those born with arms long enough to reach it. I was, in a word, insufferable.

    More slowly than I’d like, but with a finality I’ve never experienced before, I believe that I have finally begun to mature as a writer. Call it peach fuzz or that first bullseye zit between my eyes, but something’s there. 

    To be a student of English and a creative writer at the same time is a bit of a contradiction—to study authorities on writing while writing with one’s own authority seems like a misplaced bout of hubris. However, the truth and value to the study of creative writing is exactly that—it’s a process, it’s a contradiction and it’s the only way to find out who I am as a writer and a person.

    The Pablo Picasso quote goes like this: “Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist.” Echoed by the likes of Alexander McQueen and the Dalai Lama XIV, this revelation is like any other equivalent college-age epiphany—though one can hear it ad nauseam, it’s only learned and internalized through experience

    For me, it began with A.P. style.  

    This year marks my third with the student newspaper at Fordham Lincoln Center, The Observer. This time two years ago, I submitted my first piece to the paper, expecting to never hear back from them. Instead, I got a Google Doc full of edits—and a saccharine note at the bottom encouraging me to “Keep writing!” 

    I hated it. People telling me that “this might work better” were purely critics to me—not individuals with my best interests in mind. I cringed at every last “lil awk” commented offhand on a compound sentence gone awry. 

    Every writer needs someone to tell them that their stuff is trash sometimes. When that someone gets to the heart of your writing—of you—and explains what can be improved, everything grows. The writer, the editor and the piece itself, I found, were beneficiaries of this process. 

    Slowly but surely, I worked through those edits. I tuned my voice, sharpened my focus and deleted every last one of those infernal Oxford commas. 

    I stuck with The Observer, becoming an editor myself. Then, I became Editor-in-Chief.

    My new role is tougher than I ever expected. The idiom “herding cats,” when applied to 37 unpaid members of a biweekly newspaper staff, has become my favorite turn of phrase. My week invariably involves poring over 40 or so pieces of student journalism—op-eds, theater reviews and administrative exposés among them—and ensuring they’re fit to print. 

    Of the standards to which I hold my writers, most are traditional. Journalistic integrity, ethics, grammar, punctuation and the all-powerful A.P. dominate. 

    But some are my own. I know that writing worth reading is creative. It tells stories in unique ways and dares—not begs—the reader to listen.

    When I pull up a new submission on Google Drive, I’m faced with what sometimes seems like two irreconcilable responsibilities. It’s my job to mold and trim the writing before me to conform to an unwavering, annually-issued style book—and I need to make it sound good. But it’s also my responsibility to retain the original voice of the author. Their style and unique perspective matter. 

    While they may not think they’re writing creatively, I believe that they are. Journalism is formulaic by trade, but it’s a lot less gloomy and gray when the ability to tell a story in a multitude of ways is treated as a strength, not a distraction. 

    Editor-in-Chief implies that I must know a little about how to improve a piece of writing. My title doesn’t imply the second part of the job, however—that experientially, I’m just as much a fledgling writer as any first-time contributor on our staff.

    As I do my best to help my staff and contributors grow as writers—and, more importantly, grow as people—I find myself growing along with them. The lessons I try my hardest to instill in my peers are just as much for my own benefit. 

    I tell them to learn the rules, hoping that one day they will build a strong enough foundation to be able to break them. I tell myself to learn the rules, hoping that one day my strength—as a person and as a writer—will allow me to shatter the what I’ve known into just enough jagged pieces with which to build something new and meaningful.

    With every lede suggestion, source attribution and endless debate over that damn Oxford comma, I told people what I myself needed to hear most. Learn the rules. Then break them—effectively, carefully, and creatively.

  • Please Swipe Again

    Commodity Fetishism, Conspicuous Consumption and the Supreme MetroCard

    At its cheapest and lowest quantity, the advertising rate for a standard, four-color, single-side advertisement on 50,000 Metropolitan Transportation Association MetroCards is an even $25,500 (MTA).

    In July of 2012, “the latest frontier in the MTA’s campaign to squeeze new revenue from the transit system” became the ability to advertise on both the front and back of the iconic yellow card—starting at $112,000 for 250,000 cards (Mann). MetroPCS, Audible, and HBO’s Game of Thrones have all endorsed full MetroCard advertisements through the years; all randomly distributed throughout the MTA system. 

    No New Yorker’s wallet is safe: gracing mine currently is a Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show-branded card with a coupon on the reverse side that expired long before it was even issued to me. 

    But there is one MetroCard, however, that stands out from the rest, living in infamy among collectors and everyday commuters alike: the limited-edition Supreme MetroCard.

    Supreme is a clothing manufacturer known for utilizing scarcity to drive up the value of its branded products. Memorable merchandise includes a branded clay brick along with a modestly-branded plan white tee shirt—both selling for upwards of $1,000 each (Tiffany).

    When Supreme and the MTA’s tracks finally crossed, the result was fascinating to many—and likely the worst nightmare of Karl Marx and Thorstein Veblen. 

    A commodity, as defined by Karl Marx, satisfies a human desire. Supreme capitalizes on the difference between a commodity’s use value and exchange value—its intrinsic worth in contrast with its perceived value in a capitalist society. Commodity fetishism is what creates the gulf between the two. What makes the vast inflation of the price of a Supreme MetroCard so illogical or absurd is fully understood and utilized by Supreme.

    At its very essence, a MetroCard is a piece of vinyl and a magnetized strip, manufactured in large quantities and used by consumers to store value that can be exchanged for entrance into the MTA system. Its usefulness simply as a yellow rectangle is negligible; however, its ability to transfer value gives this commodity a value of its own. It acts in the place of money; itself intrinsically worthless but representative of some amount of perceived value.

    In this way, the MetroCard has no first-order use value but takes on use value when its larger role in the grand scheme of currency is considered. Its exchange value becomes its primary use value when put into the context of a greater capitalist system.

    The exchange value of a MetroCard in this higher sense, then, depends entirely on the amount of currency represented on the card. This makes the humble MetroCard a useful, but largely unfetishized commodity—that is, until another element is introduced to make the card desirable outside of its role as a conduit of value transfer. 

    This is where Supreme comes in.

    Though many ads on MetroCards are simply seen as a nuisance, the Supreme MetroCard, introduced in July of 2017, was the latest in a long line of commodities fetishized—according to Marx—far beyond their traditional use values. 

    The card was red and white, with “Supreme” written on the side opposite the iconic yellow logo. It was released in limited numbers in stations across New York City and sold for $5.50. 

    The cards were loaded with enough fare for two trips in the MTA system. Their intrinsic value—on a primary level as red strips of vinyl and on a secondary level as a means for holding and transferring value—was rather low.

    In the ensuing weeks, Supreme MetroCards resold for as much as $999.97 on eBay. 

    This valuation fails to correlate with any conception of the intrinsic value of a MetroCard—a prime example of the fetishism Marx argues destroys the link between utility and value in a capitalist society. The “mystical” x-factor that makes consumers amenable to paying almost a thousand dollars for an aftermarket MetroCard: the combination of artificial scarcity, brand recognition and other societal factors that amounts to a true capitalist fetish. 

    One of the contributing factors to the fetishization of commodities is elaborated upon by later economist Thorstein Veblen in The Theory of the Leisure Class. Like Capital, Veblen’s work lampoons its titular subject, arguing that “the emergence of a leisure class coincides with the beginning of ownership,” a statement reminiscent of Marx’s conception of the bourgeoisie and their reliance on capitalism. Conspicuous consumption—the pursuit of commodities regarded to be of great value in order to display wealth and power in a capitalist society—is characteristic of Veblen’s leisure class. 

    This helps to further explain the extreme overvaluation of the Supreme MetroCard—and all other merchandise with unequal use and exchange values. While a MetroCard would simply allow a working-class member of society to access public transportation, a Supreme MetroCard appeals to those of higher socioeconomic status because of its perceived exchange value. It is rare, and it is expensive—a perfect display of wealth and power for a class of people with nothing better to do than flaunt.

    Through Marx’s theory of commodity fetishization, developed and augmented by Veblen’s concept of conspicuous consumption, the frenzy surrounding the release of the Supreme MetroCard—almost religious, as Marx asserts—makes perfect sense. A capitalist culture imbued the brand of Supreme and all of their merchandise with a value far exceeding their utility and total labor necessary to produce them, and the leisure class bought Supreme MetroCards for $999.97 because the perceived “value” of displaying their wealth and power made the price tag more than worth it. 

    The other day, I saw a rat faithfully pulling a MetroCard into a hole in the subway station tile. I don’t know why it did so; the card’s utility to that particular rat was completely foreign to me. I imagined that it was a special Supreme card, perhaps dropped accidentally on to the subway tracks by a careless subway-goer. I can only hope the rat knew how much money was paid for that little red card.

    Works Cited


    • Veblen, Thorstein. The Theory of the Leisure Class. London: Penguin Classics, 1994. Print.
    • Marx, Karl. Capital. London: Penguin Classics, 1994. Print.
    • Tiffany, Kaitlyn. “The MTA’s Supreme-branded MetroCard is a hot commodity.” The Verge, https://www.theverge.com/2017/2/20/14674604/mta-supreme-metro-cards-nyc-subway-resale. Accessed 26 April 2019.
    • “Advertise on MetroCard.” MTA, http://web.mta.info/nyct/RatestoAdvertiseonMetroCard.html. Accessed 27 April 2019.
    • Mann, Ted. “MetroCards Get Advertising Makeover.” WSJ, https://blogs.wsj.com/metropolis/2012/07/18/metrocards-get-advertising-makeover. Accessed 27 April 2019.
    • “Supreme Metro Card NYC Subway MTA Train Pass New York City Metrocard SS17 X.” eBay, https://www.ebay.com/itm/Supreme-Metro-Card-NYC-Subway-MTA-Train-Pass-New-York-City-Metrocard-SS17-X-/282370033138. Accessed 26 April 2019.
  • Mr. Steichen’s Well-Intentioned Spell

    The (Great) Family of Man and the consequences of mythmaking

    503 photographs were used in the final exhibition of The Family of Man, including Dorothea Lange’s famous Migrant Mother. The images of the hydrogen bomb test and aftermath of a lynching were omitted from both the physical exhibition and the printed book thereafter. The exhibit toured the world, reaching 9 million people—the most for any photo exhibit—in 37 countries on six continents. This did not include China, Spain, or Vietnam (MoMa).

    Edward Steichen’s Family of Man has lived a double life of sameness and otherness since its first showing in the Museum of Modern Art in 1955. The exhibit’s great undertaking in attempting to capture the similarities of cultures worldwide could never have been perfectly comprehensive. However, the deeper meaning and motivation for the exhibit is what has been called into question.

    The myth that it posits—the “great” family of man—understood within Roland Barthes’s formulation of myth, intends to show that a collection of snapshots of the human experience mean something more. 

    Some called this thinking reductionist; others praised its humbling effectiveness. In both cases, Barthes’s thinking rings true: The Family of Man legitimizes the myth of the same name by taking a collection of human images, all with their own meanings, and deriving a second-order connotation from this collective (Barthes). The exhibit, as a sum of its parts, champions the values of similarity and shared human experience. Said Steichen himself, “Photography communicates equally to everybody throughout the world. It is the only universal language we have, the only one requiring no translation” (Steichen). 

    His confidence in the legitimacy of his mythmaking was called into question, especially by Barthes, but the human tendency to derive higher meaning from simple concepts persisted—and persists to this day.

    Barthes acknowledges that the French translation of this exhibit, The Great Family of Man, implies sentimental and moral connections where a lack of “great” would simply suggest zoological similarity. An “alibi to a large part of our humanism,” this notion of shared human experience contributes to the myth of The (Great) Family of Man. Criticizing the medium and presentation, Barthes argues that photography is dangerously reductionist. “…if one removes history from [universal fact], there is nothing more to be said about them… To reproduce death or birth tells us, literally, nothing” (Barthes). 

    Further criticism of Steichen’s high-reaching conclusions from 503 photographs points out that mythmaking is often founded on the negation of nuance. Said Phoebe-Lou Adams in Atlantic Monthly shortly after the exhibit opened, “If Mr. Steichen’s well-intentioned spell doesn’t work, it can only be because he has been so intent on [Mankind’s] physical similarities that… he has utterly forgotten that a family quarrel can be as fierce as any other kind” (Adams). Abetting this are the exhibit’s own conscious choices already listed: omitting two powerful negative images and failing to visit three countries. That these three countries may not have even desired to exhibit The Great Family of Man complicates the validity of such generalizations further. 

    When seeing The (Great) Family of Man, museum-goers then and readers in the present are wont to “see no evil” if they were to experience the full effect of Steichen’s myth. In her 1977 collection of essays, On Photography, artist and activist Susan Sontag echoed Barthes’s criticism of the lack of nuance and context so essential to the higher-order connotations of myth: “By purporting to show that individuals are born, work, laugh, and die everywhere in the same way, ‘The Family of Man’ denies the determining weight of history – of genuine and historically embedded differences, injustices, and conflicts” (Sontag). She acknowledges Steichen’s collection as an expression of humanism, as Barthes does, and does the opposite of mythmaking—she puts the work in critical context. To her, the post-war period in which the exhibit was made fostered a popular culture wanting to assume the best in people, “…to be consoled and distracted by a sentimental humanism” (Sontag).

    The generalization characteristic of myth does not only work to nefarious and revisionist effect, however. That much can be seen from Steichen’s faith in the ability of his work to unite humanity in a positive way—suggested in the very name Family of Man. From a special issue of Aperture Magazine on the exhibit, Barbara Morgan asserts that “… Empathy with these hundreds of human beings truly expands our sense of values” (Morgan). Whether this empathy is well-founded and such values deserving to be universalized is up for contention, but the effect of myth is evident nevertheless. 

    In creating a second-order meaning from a series of independent, meaningful entities, The Family of Man succeeds. The exhibit uses photography to represent this myth visually: that humans are far more alike than different. Though perhaps best understood with historical context and painstaking nuance, assertions of human nature are far more given to the process of mythmaking. Steichen’s exhibit, for all its shortcomings, succeeds in the creation of higher-order meaning, but the rest of society is tasked with determining its validity. Like many myths, The Family of Man is at once reductionist fluff and elegiac truth—at the end of the day, it is simply something for the audience to behold.

    Works Cited


    • Barthes, Roland. “Mythologies.” Literary Theory, ed. by Julie Rivkin and Michael Ryan, Blackwell, 2019, pp. 88-89
    • “Edward Steichen at The Family of Man, 1955.” MoMa, https://www.moma.org/research-and-learning/archives/archives-highlights-06-1955. Accessed 4 March 2019.
    • Steichen, Edward. “Photography: Witness and Recorder of History.” Wisconsin Magazine of History, vol. 41 no. 3, 1958.
    • Morgan, Barbara. “The Theme Show: A Contemporary Exhibition Technique” in “The Controversial Family of Man.” Aperture, vol. 3, no. 2, 1955.
    • Sontag, Susan. “On Photography.” Penguin, Harmandsworth, 1977.
    • Adams, Phoebe-Lou. “Through a Lens Darkly” in “The Controversial Family of Man.” Atlantic Monthly, no. 195, 1955.
  • I’ve Gotten This Far Without Trilling My R’s

    ¡CIENTO VEINTIDÓS!

    ¡CIENTO VEINTIDÓS!

    ¡CIENTO VEINTIDÓS!

    There was no significance behind it. To the three whiter-than-white seventh-graders chanting “one hundred twenty-two!” in the back of Señora O’SmithSchneiderStein’s Spanish 1 classroom, the syllables that tumbled from their mouths simply felt good on their tongues—and, after all, it was funny.

    Funny in the same way that kids would shout things like TAREAAAAA and PAPAS FRRRRRITAS during vocabulary review sessions to get a laugh out of their classmates.

    The way we learned the cultural significance of the baCHAta before donning colorful dollar store sombreros and filling paper plates with tortEEya chips and UNE POCOE de SAALSA.

    But not guacamole. It was green, after all. VERDAY. We were a little suspicious.

    Have you ever heard kids with heavy Philadelphia accents go through their first years of learning Spanish? The same people that drink WOODER bottles and root for the IGGLES on winter Sundays send children off to school each day knowing that their offspring will butcher two languages before the day is done.

    ~

    The United States of America has no national language. Our melting pot PR is very good. However, thirty of the fifty states in the union have laws mandating English be spoken in all important official interactions and exchanges, and Geno’s Steaks is famous for proudly displaying “This is America, when ordering, speak English” in its window.

    Obviously, people here care a lot about how they are allowed to express themselves and tell their stories. The fear of people saying things we don’t understand (while also never making the effort to understand) has inevitably taken root in the public school system. Suburban Philly kids are not alone in their hatred of Spanish class. The nation’s majority cry out from the un-air-conditioned half-open windows of their schools with an arrogance almost as palpable as their ignorance: 

    When are we going to actually interact with someone who actually speaks Spanish? Like “Gimme a cheesesteak wit” is even English.

    But it’s cool to be ignorant. Doing terrible in a foreign language class is just as acceptable as struggling with math—communicating with others is permitted to be “just not my thing.”

     The “humanities” surely include literature, but we’re under the impression that only what we can already comprehend counts. To deny another human’s expression—to render their literature, their language inapplicable to you—is to negate their existence. I’ve polled the room, and the 11th graders bored out of their minds in Spanish class don’t seem to mind all that much.

    ~

    Accent and emphasis are the two key elements of Spanish pronunciation. In Spanish class, you’ll get along just fine without them. While it is assumed that emphasis is placed on the penultimate syllable, sometimes it lies elsewhere, wherein we denote this emphasis with what we call an ACK-SCENTO ( ´ ). The funny little snake atop the N in MANYANA is called a TILL DAY  ( ~ ). Accents define regional dialects and can give you a good sense of where someone’s from or who they hang out with. If they replace their YYYs with soft JJJJs, they’re probably Argentinian, Uruguayan, or somewhere in that neighborhood.

    If they say things like pWEDO EER ull BAHNYO right before the quiz to go study and vape in the bathroom, they might just be an American teen duped into thinking their world is far smaller than it actually is.

    ~

    I like to imagine that, just as we enjoy characters in movies with heavy foreign accents, people from Spanish-speaking countries see movies with Americans that have that perfect mixture of Spanish mastery and unmistakable English steamrolling of syllables. Perhaps that’s why I’d be able to understand Spanish with impeccable accuracy so long as everyone spoke like the skipping cassette recording we used in middle school.

    Ac-Actividad… uno. Escuchen a las siguientes palabras y marque con un circulo la respuesta correcta que corresponde a cada pregunta.

    Perhaps the Spanish learning experience—foreign relations in general, even—would be better for everyone if we spoke loudly, slowly, and only about the weather and the whereabouts of the nearest library.

    ~

    The last time anyone bothered to check (2008), 58% of middle schools in the United states taught foreign languages. Twenty-five percent of elementary schools, if you care. We are creatures born with a desire to communicate and an unabashed love for language, but that magic biological window that ends on one’s 18th birthday for learning a language seems to be a resource yet untapped for the better part of America’s population of monolinguists. The kids don’t really care.

    They’ve never been given a reason to care. 

    Nations around the world brag about their high percentages of bilinguals, but we have the luxury of speaking from birth the language everyone on Earth strives to master if they want to puncture the international seal and inject the tiniest bit of personal experience and struggle. The future engineers and stockbrokers and English teachers of the world sit through Spanish class because they have to, letting riches go in one ear and out the other simply because they cannot be bothered to convert the currency. 

    By the time English-speakers get to high school, where a foreign language is required in 91% of schools, it’s too late. Their best language-learning years are running out, and there are more pressing matters to attend to than Spanish 1 workbooks. A token class period to sing songs about “EEZKEYERDA, DUHRECHA, DUHLANTAY, DUHTRASS” and whisper test answers in English does little to build the foundations of language. More often than not, these efforts amount to no more than shallow graves.

    ~

    CircumloCUTION means “talking around the word I need to say because I forgot my dictionary and just blanked on how to say ‘where is the discoTEca.’” Talking around something is excusing your monolinguity with a dismissive wave because you will never, ever, have to communicate with someone who doesn’t talk like you. And you really don’t want the hassle, anyway.

    CircunloQUIo is how students ramble on and gesticulate wildly in the middle of their presentation on Bodas de Sangre because they never really bothered to read it because, you know—it was in a foreign language.

    It was someone else’s story. If the literature was that good, how come we didn’t learn it in English class?

    ~

    Words that sound similar in English and Spanish are called “cognates.” CogNAtos. Kids in Spanish class love those. Beware, however, of false cognates—Pope and potato, pregnant and embarrassed, exit and success headline words that should not be confused with each other across languages. If someone spills a drink and tells you that they’re emBAraZAda, ask them when the baby’s due. Confusion is inevitable when you present someone with something significant but told in a manner to which they cannot fully relate. The lack of one-to-one comparisons is more than enough to discourage those who demand mathematical answers to human questions.

    Have you ever tried watching the news in a different language? Suddenly, everything is happening outside yourself, in a world where your words mean nothing. You may sit diligently though every last mediocre Spanish class in high school, score decent marks on your placement exams and pursue it as an avenue of study in college, but I think I speak for all the whiter-than-white college kids still chanting CIENTO VEINTIDÓS under their breath with a grin when I say that feeling like an outsider in Spanish class is some poetic irony.

    ~

    Should I tell my story in a language I’ve only co-opted? I question whether I’d even be communicating authentically using words that are not my own. To make them mine smacks of the very process of conquering that made my mother tongue the alpha throughout the world. My problems are minute when we speak of relativity; but just as I am free to communicate and co-humanize with the majority of my country, I am locked out of so many others. At its worst, Spanish class is less a passport and more a ticket to gawk at the Other; to imitate its movements and mimic its vocalizations. Call it lip service, satire, or blatant farce—most just call it fifth period. A prerequisite to graduation. A participation trophy.

    But I do not study the language to apologize for my countrymen and classmates in TEXCESS and LOSS ANJULUS demanding their neighbors speak American. 

    My EMbarAZO when I talk is the very thing that chains me to the back row of my high school Spanish class. The eggshells I crush underfoot with every butchered proNUNciAciON are, I suspect, self-placed. That if I simply let go of the parts of my identity that stick out when I fumble over TILL DAYs and encaBALgamiENto, I’d finally do the language justice. I’d be someone who shares—not takes, nor simply observes from afar—the experiences, the life, and the humanity of a fellow human.

    How do you know if you’re really, truly honoring a language? Ask a native speaker, and I suppose they’ll give you an answer. But they might just ask you the same question instead.

  • Literacy Vignettes

    1

    My first experience with literature (more of a false start, really) came beside a pile of old second-hand books on the shelves of a TV armoire in Raymour & Flanigan.

    To a two-year-old, the furniture store is probably up there with flu shots and NPR on the NO scale. But all the NO’s in the world wouldn’t stop my parents from their search for the perfect end table, so there we were.

    At the top of the modest stack of outdated self-help books and Windows 96 For Dummies lay a single paperback volume, creased to all hell on the edges and spine, bearing the likenesses of a certain Jerry Seinfeld, George Costanza, Elaine Benes, and Cosmo Kramer.

    I had partaken in the almost ritualistic watching of Seinfeld reruns with my dad for as long as I could remember. After all those nights in front of the TV enjoying the show simply because my dad was and laughing whenever he did, I recognized the gang immediately. 

    “Seinfeld,” I said to my mom, brandishing the book above my head to show her.

    It was the people from Seinfeld, their faces were right there. The letters at the top of the book never really registered as anything. Didn’t all books have them? They were probably there for decoration.

    The bewildered look on the sales lady’s face suggested otherwise. It seemed the entire home office department was under the impression that this little kid had just read the English language with remarkable cadence and ease. My mom, privy to my actual (nonexistent) reading capabilities, took my hand and led me away to some other section of the store. I didn’t know why she was stifling her laughter behind a furniture brochure, and frankly, two-year-old Owen didn’t care. I had just seen Seinfeld on the front of a book—if that doesn’t make a kid’s day, I don’t know what will.

    Books have been making my day ever since.

    2

    For some people, a good book is like a bowl of oatmeal. Some enjoy it, some choke it down because it’s good for them, but it sticks with them for a while regardless, even long after they’re done.

    To me, a good book is a lot like junk food. I’ll finish the book, closing the back cover with great satisfaction, taste still in my mouth. I’ll tell other people how good it was, maybe rave about it on the internet, maybe leave a five-star review somewhere. And in fifteen minutes, I’ll be hungry again. And the soy sauce packets just keep piling up.

    When I was young, I was always dissatisfied with literature.

    In first grade, I had no patience for Cam Jansen, with her open-and-shut mysteries and gimmicky “photographic memory.” Junie B. Jones was just so whiny all the time. I gave the Magic Tree House a chance, but it was just the same thing over and over again. 

    “The tree house started to spin. It spun faster and faster. Then everything was still. Absolutely still.”

    Every. Single. Book. And Mary Pope Osbourne could churn out a new 100-page installment faster than you could say “James Patterson.” One needn’t have worried if Jack and Annie made it out of their most recent predicament alive; there were always forty more books in the series.

    Of course, I read them all anyway. They were there. At the dinner table, during class, in the bathroom, reading. Before school, after school, past my bedtime, reading. At one point, I yelled indignantly down the steps that my parents had to be the only parents on the block who got mad at their kid for reading. 

    Admittedly, I should have been doing the dishes, but hey—The Chronicles of Narnia don’t exactly read themselves.

    But one day, the flow of books dried up. There just weren’t any more books for a kid to read, at least not in the places in the library I was accustomed to looking. Nonfiction was off the table. I needed stories, and with nowhere else to turn, I had but one place to satisfy my hunger for literature: the YA section. 

    Excuse me while I cringe a little.

    Young adult literature admittedly has its flaws. Sarah Dessen, I’m looking at you. But the real reason I had a hard time with this whole new world of literature was that I was entirely in over my head. I had no concept of teen angst; I felt no connection to love triangles and could never understand why the main character chose to kiss their obvious love interest when there was a world to save or a giant zeppelin to pilot. They fed my voracious appetite for words, so I couldn’t complain. 

    In retrospect, I realize this was the point where I started to chew books just a little bit slower, savoring pages more than ever. At this point, whether I understood what I was reading or not, I started to realize how good literature could actually be. And maybe I could do that, too.

    3

    How to Bullshit Poetry
    Owen Roche

    She looked away

    The leaves fluttered

    In

    The

    Dappled

    Sunlight

    The cigarette was a bullet between his lips

    And it sang.

    The coffee was cold.

    He only knew the name they told him was his

    was his

    Was mine.

    Your eyes were Dalmatians.

    Where is the rain?

    Where is your rain?

    The sweet roar of bellowing roses

    That You p r o m i s e d

    For

    All

    These

    Years?

    4

    It took me a while to realize that while I could take in all this literature from all of these different authors, I could make some of my own. But I’m glad; if it weren’t for all the out-of-my-league books I struggled through, I wouldn’t have the infatuation with commas, unhealthy obsession with the em dash, or fascination with the rhythm of prose I possess today. Before I knew what any of those things were or how to quantify them, I simply took them in in their rawest form, subconsciously stockpiling an arsenal of punctuation and sentence structure.

    My first literary work I remember was a piece called How to Escape in the Middle of the Night that I wrote in second grade. I didn’t have any experience in the subject matter, but I didn’t let the details stop me.

    Whatever I was doing, I knew I enjoyed it. I could tell stories and weave the intangible out of pencil, paper, ink, and crayon. The language that had been a part of me from the beginning went from being an exhibit behind a red rope to my own personal tool that could stay in my back pocket for the rest of my life. 

    My problem with writing is that I want whatever I put on paper to sound like a final copy the first time. I think I’ve surrounded myself with so much of others’ good writing that my own writing voice wants to sound as polished as the great ones on the first pass. There’s some part of my brain that refuses to believe my favorite authors have backspace keys on their laptops, or trash cans filled to the brim with crumpled-up paper. 

    I know that I’m at my best when I can just vomit words all over the computer screen, then go back to the beginning and start to mop up the mess like some sort of literary janitor. It’s a lesson in humility, I know—hubris doesn’t lend itself well to writing or reading. 

    Good talk.

    5

    Block
    Owen Roche

    From the conveyor belt riveted to the walls of my mind

    Come chunks

    With serifs poking out

    At disjointed angles,

    Lumpy and raw.

    Grotesque, really.

    There’s time, I know

    While the globs of brain-stuff are still wet

    To mold

    And coat my hands in excess like

    A potter at the wheel

    And leave the ghosts of long-lost thought

    Like dirty, dingy coffee rings

    But why would I 

    Disgrace

    A page so white and fresh

    As this?

    6

    Maybe I’d write something. Poetry isn’t really a guy thing; y’know? Sure, there are all those famous male poets, but no other guy in the class raised his hand when they needed people to read for Poetry Day.

    Reading in front of all of those people? Is high school really the appropriate venue to showcase my sensitive side? Would it be weird?

    Well, I’ve written some good stuff in the past. I mean, thought it was pretty good. I think I have some talent, maybe not enough to read out loud—

    I saw her twist around in her chair, hair falling to the side of the desk.

    Her eyes sparkled as she mouthed a message:

    I can’t wait to see what you write.

    I’m definitely writing something.

    Hell, maybe I’ll make it rhyme.

  • St. Lawrence of Rome

    St. Lawrence of Rome (225-258 AD) is the patron saint of archivists, brewers, chefs, comedians, laundry workers, students, tanners, and wine makers, to name a few alphabetically. You’d be surprised to learn a saint with such a diverse patronage portfolio may have only been the stuff of legends.

    Then again, that just makes me like him more.

    Though Lawrence lived long before TMZ and Lifetime documentaries, some hazy details survive today. He is said to have been a promising young archdeacon of Rome, assigned to this position by longtime friend Pope Sixtus II. Lawrence was in charge of the Church’s riches in that little corner of the world, and he often found himself documenting the history of Christianity to make it accessible for the masses.

    In August 258, Roman Emperor Valerian issued an edict that all bishops, priests, and deacons should immediately be put to death. When confronted to hand over not only his life but the riches of the Church, Lawrence asked for three days’ time to assemble everything—during which he proceeded to distribute as much wealth as he could to the poor. 

    When Valerian came to collect his dues, the archbishop of Rome instead presented the emperor with the suffering, crippled, and blind, proclaiming that these people were the true treasures of the church.

    Long story short, he was grilled to death on a large gridiron—not before uttering his famous last words: “Turn me over, I’m well done on this side!”

    The story of Saint Lawrence may not be true. And I’m okay with that, because I believe the real impact he has made on me is exactly that: the power of story. 

    When Hamlet dies in the play bearing his name, his final wish is to have his story told. I don’t think St. Lawrence ever desired that, but fiery death aside, he lived a good life—promoting literacy, venerating the marginalized, and keeping the peace within his domain. That itself seems like the stuff of legends. 

    To give posterity a hero to keep forever—to create such a story that the essence of the good you do lives on forever—that’s pretty legendary, too. To live a life worth telling and retelling for generations is a lofty goal, but an admirable one as well.

    Aside from his slow-roasted demise, St. Lawrence isn’t too bad of a guy to model your life around. I have no dreams of holding high office in the Catholic church, but I do aspire to be someone with their priorities in order. Someone who values all the right things. 

    Someone who knows what their real treasures are. 

    And, when the end finally comes, I hope I’ll have a funny quip to be remembered by.